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Best Non-Sex Performance!

Look what's going on my mantlepiece! (I don't have a mantlepiece.)

Look what's going on my mantlepiece! (I don't have a mantlepiece.)

I'm so glad they included "PhD." Respect!

I'm so glad they included "PhD." Respect!

I don't know if anyone reads this blog. To be honest, I forget it even exists. One thing I don't lack is opportunities to write/speak about what's going on. So, apologies to anyone who follows this and is wondering where I go for months at a time. (If that's you, drop me a line so I know you're out there.) I sort of assume that most people who are interested in what I'm up to follow my podcast, where I rant about whatever's happening on a weekly basis. But to be honest, I rarely listen to podcasts, so why should I assume anyone else does?

Anyway, the news this week is that I won an AVN award. The AVNs are considered "the Oscars of porn." Cassie and I had cameo roles in a film called Marriage 2.0, which is an ambitious film about a couple going through the growing pains that generally accompany deciding to open their relationship. The woman in the couple, played by India Summers, is a documentary film-maker, so her character decides to interview some "experts" on alternative relationships—which is where we come in. So Cassie and I are interviewed by her, and then India and I have a scene in the kitchen (fully clothed, alas) where we have a friendly chat about the challenges of pursuing authenticity in a relationship. The experience of being in a porn movie was fun and strange in all the best ways. And now I have another bizarre line to add to my already surreal resume.